A D V E R T I S E M E N T

Little Johnny & April

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slept through the class.

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.  read more »

4.09091
Average: 4.1 (253 votes)
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Little Johnny & April

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slept through the class.

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.  read more »

4.09091
Average: 4.1 (253 votes)
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An FBI investigation

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!"

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave.

The phone rings at the neighbors house. Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?"

"Yep."

"Did they chop your firewood?"

"Yep."

"Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

4.065935
Average: 4.1 (91 votes)
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An FBI investigation

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!"

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave.

The phone rings at the neighbors house. Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?"

"Yep."

"Did they chop your firewood?"

"Yep."

"Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

4.065935
Average: 4.1 (91 votes)
Your rating: None

An FBI investigation

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!"

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave.

The phone rings at the neighbors house. Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?"

"Yep."

"Did they chop your firewood?"

"Yep."

"Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

4.065935
Average: 4.1 (91 votes)
Your rating: None

An FBI investigation

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!"

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave.

The phone rings at the neighbors house. Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?"

"Yep."

"Did they chop your firewood?"

"Yep."

"Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

4.065935
Average: 4.1 (91 votes)
Your rating: None

This farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster and he wants chicks.

This farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster and he wants chicks.

So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster which he would sell. The other farmer says, "Yeah, I’ve got this great rooster named Chuck. He’ll service every chicken you got, no problem."  read more »

4.04348
Average: 4 (23 votes)
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The Bar

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar:

-------------------------------------

| Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 |

| Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 |

| Hand Job: $10.00 |

-------------------------------------

Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.

"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?"

"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand jobs?"  read more »

4.03226
Average: 4 (31 votes)
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The teacher of the fourth grade class was giving an English lesson

The teacher of the fourth grade class was giving an English lesson:

"All right class, I want everyone to write a sentence which starts with a question and ends with an answer and has the words possible and definite in it!"

All at once, young Johnny's hand shot up.

"Miss! Miss!" called Johnny.
"Write it down, Johnny!" said the teacher.
" ... But Miss! Miss! Miss!" Johnny intoned.

"I said write it down!" exclaimed the teacher who was now quite peeved.
"Miss! Miss!" called Johnny once more.
"Okay, Johnny. I give up. What is it?"
"Is it possible that farts have lumps in them?"  read more »

3.767855
Average: 3.8 (56 votes)
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laffing horse.

a man walks into a bar sits down and orders a beer.
he notices a big glass jar on the bar full of 50 doller bills, and it has a sign on it "win the money". the guy asks the bar tender what he has to to do to win the money., bar tender says "i got a horse in the back, if you can make him laff you can keep the jar.  read more »

3.72152
Average: 3.7 (79 votes)
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