Language Jokes

Yo mama so nasty

jonnyboy — Mon, 14 Feb 2011 17:26:27 +0100

yo mama so nasty she sucked yo daddy dick and kissed you goodnight

yo moma

yomoma31 — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 03:13:31 +0200

your moma is so fat when she stepped on the scale , it sait get the f*ck of me

why do chinese people never use a phone book

emzeedee — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 13:03:10 +0200

Q; why do Chinese people never use a phone-book?
A; because there's so many wings and wongs somebody could wing the wong number!

the world these days

yocumm.3699 — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 20:10:07 +0200

Im so tired of the speech kids are using these days! kids are using words like sick meaning cool... could you guys imagine what it would be like if they were talking to people that didnt knowthe slang? it'd be like "you like my cookin?" "Yeah this stuff is sick! its so discusting homie!" your mom walks in ready for the movies "how do i look honey" "yo baby you look discusting!". read more »

The difference a little punctuation makes...

boloo2 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:10:39 +0200

Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy - will you let me be yours?

Gloria

Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being read more »

The English language

boloo2 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:10:04 +0200

There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple or pine in pineapple. And while no one knows what is in a hotdog, you can be pretty sure it isn't canine.

English muffins were not invented in England nor French fries in France. read more »

Alphabet letters

boloo2 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:09:45 +0200

How many letters are there in the alphabet?

Noel, noel, noel, noel ... the angels did say...

E.T. went home.

Get rid of X. There's too many unknowns in the world already!

(Only one vowel left, or is that "Anly ana vawal laft" This may be stretching it a bit, but not unless you consider, as our good friends in Canada say: Good day, A!

And we all know that M&Ms melt in your mouth, so it's safe to count them out.

And of course, Y not.

We might as well put off using U until later in the year: See U in September

TWA just took off!!

Double Positives?

boloo2 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:08:17 +0200

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive.
In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."

A voice from the back of the room piped up, 'Yeah, right.'

Spelling Poem

boloo2 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 14:08:02 +0200

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.