Heaven & Hell Jokes

a kid and a teacher were arguing about how a whale can't eat a person the kid said when i go to heaven ill ask jonny he got eaten by a whale the teacher said what if he went to hell the kid said then you ask him

a kid and a teacher were arguing about how a whale can't eat a person the kid said when i go to heaven ill ask jonny he got eaten by a whale the teacher said what if he went to hell the kid said then you ask him

mummy,mummy why are we pushing the car offthe cliff? shut up or you'll wake your father

yo mamma is so white when she went to heaven she blended in like a ghost

yo mamma is so white when she went to heaven she blended in like a ghost

yo momma so ugly she joined an ugly contest,they said sorry"no professionals

how do u spell ackmed? said a bloke in a bar, and ackmed said, ......a.....c....flem.......m......e......d!

ok so there is a blonde, brown, and a red head,and they want to get to heaven.there was 100,000 steps to heaven.So god told them he was going to tell them a joke on each step and if they laughed the couldn't go to heaven. So on the first step the brown head laughed on the 55,000th step the blonde laughed.  read more »

Bob dies and finds himself in hell. While he's wallowing in self pity, he stumbles across a demon.

Demon: Why so glum?
Man: Why'd you think? I'm in hell!
Demon: Aww, hells not so bad. Actually, we have a lot of fun!
Man: ...huh?
Demon: Do you drink?
Man: Yes...  read more »

There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him.

An angel hears his plea and appears to him.
"Sorry, but you can't take your wealth with you."  read more »