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Ethnic Jokes

The Italian

One day I go to Toronto and stay in a bigga hotel.

I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waitress I wanna two pissa toast. She bring me only one piss.

I tella her I wanna two piss; she say, go to toilet - I say, you no understand, I wanna two piss on my plate. She say you betta no piss on plate, you sonna ma b*tch! I don't even know lady, she calla me somma ma b*tch.

Then I go to pharmacia with a cougha. The man he give me candy ana tell me fa cough! - I don't even know man ana he tella me FA COUGH!  read more »

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Official Polish Sex Quiz

Study each question carefully. Then, choose the answer that seems most correct (True or False) and mark an "X" (just like you sign your name) under the appropriate heading on the right side.

> TRUE FALSE
1. A clitoris is a type of flower.
|______|______|

2. Pubic hair is a wild rabbit.
|______|______|

3. "Spread Eagle" is an extinct bird.
|______|______|

4. Vagina is a medical term used to describe heart trouble.
|______|______|

5. Menstrual cycle has three (3) wheels.
|______|______|

6. A G-string is part of a violin.
|______|______|  read more »

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The Russian who made a wish

A Russian is strolling down the street in Moscow and kicks a bottle laying in the street. Suddenly out of the bottle comes a Genie. The Russian is stunned and the Genie says, "Hello master, I will grant you one wish, anything you want."

The Russian begins thinking, "Well, I really like drinking vodka." Finally the Russian says, "I wish to drink vodka whenever I want,so make me piss vodka."  read more »

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How I got my name?

A Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look on his face.

"Say Mom, why is my bigger brother named Mighty Storm"?
"Because he was conceived during a mighty storm", she said.

Then he asked "Why is my sister named Cornflower"?
"Well your father and I were in a cornfield when we made her", she replied.

He then asked "And why is my other sister called Moonchild"?
"We were watching the moon-landing when she was conceived", the mother replies.

The mother paused and said to her son...
"Tell me, Torn Rubber, why are you so curious"

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What you do best!

This suave-looking Redneck, (ok, just pretend there is one) walks into a bar and sees a cute little rich girl who's had too much to drink.

He says to her, "Hey, baby...whataya say we go back to your place and get it on! Lost in her drink, she replies - "Sure, why not!"

They get to her place, and she lies on the bed and says, "Ok, show me what you do best!".

Without delay, the Redneck rips off his jacket, -
grabs her T.V., VCR, and purse and runs out the door!

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Chinese dog treat

There were three men: an Englishman, a Scotsman, and a Chinese guy. They were having a competition to see which one could walk his dog over the desert without needing a drink.

So the Englishman sets off, but he only gets half way.
Then the Scotsman sets off, and he only gets half way too.
But the Chinise guy manages to get all the way across the desert.
The Englishman and the Scottsman asked him how he could possibly do that without any water?

"Me Chinese. Me not Silly, Me stick mouth round doggy's willy"

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Chinese Goer

A Chinese man arranges for a hooker to come to his room for the evening. Once in the room they undress, climb into bed, and go at it.

When finished, the Chinese man jumps up, runs over to the window, takes deep breath, dives under the bed, climbs out the other side, jumps back into bed with the hooker and commences to repeat the performance.  read more »

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Ho-down!

Why do black men not go square dancing?

Every time some one yells "hoe down", they turn to see if their sister got shot!

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Happy Happy

A young Japanese girl had been taught all of her life that when she married she was to please her husband and never upset him.

So the first morning of her honeymoon when the young Japanese bride crawled out of the bed after making love and she stooped down to pick up her husband's clothes and she let a big fart.

She looked up and said: "Scuse prease, front hole so happy back hole whistle!"

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R U A Real Cowboy?

An old cowboy dressed to kill with cowboy shirt, hat, jeans, spurs and chaps went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat there sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him.

After she ordered her drink she turned to the cowboy and asked him, "Are you a real cowboy?"

"Well, I have spent my whole life on the ranch herding cows, breaking horses, mending fences... I guess I am," replied the cowboy.
After a short while he asked her what she was.  read more »

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