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Entertainment Jokes

What do Barbie and Britney Spears have in common?

Q: What do Barbie and Britney Spears have in common?

A: Both are blonde, brainless and made out of plastic.

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Clinton vs Titanic

Similarities between the Titanic video and the Clinton grand jury testimony video:

Titanic: $9.99 on the Internet
Clinton: $9.99 on the Internet

Titanic: over 3 hours long
Clinton: over 3 hours long

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe

Titanic: villain - White Star Line
Clinton: villain - Ken Starr

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist
Clinton: Bill is a B.S. artist

Titanic: In one part, Jack enjoys a good cigar
Clinton: Ditto for Bill  read more »

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How did Captain Hook die?

How did Captain Hook die?

He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!!

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How do you keep Alec Baldwin from drowning?

Q: How do you keep Alec Baldwin from drowning?
A1: You take your foot off his head.
A2: Get the lead out of his ass.
A3: Chisel the concrete off his feet.

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What advice does Cool Breeze give the fish?

What advice does Cool Breeze give the fish?

"Watch for the Hook."

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What did the man in the big yellow hat have to do every day when Curious George broke a glass or a plate?

What did the man in the big yellow hat have to do every day when Curious George broke a glass or a plate?

Spank his monkey.

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What does Tiger Woods have that Princess Diana didn't?

What does Tiger Woods have that Princess Diana didn't?

A good driver.

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What's the difference between Simba and O.J. Simpson?

What's the difference between Simba and O.J. Simpson?

One's an African lion, and the other's a lion African.

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Things You Wouldn't Know Without Movies

Things You Wouldn't Know Without Movies

-It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.

-A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

-If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

-Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.  read more »

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One day Steven Spielberg, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Pierce Brosnan...

One day Steven Spielberg, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Pierce Brosnan were in a jungle in order to take some shots for a movie. Unfortunately, they were caught by a tribal group. As they were about to be executed they pleaded to the Queen of the Tribe for her mercy. She said, "Get me something good to eat. If I like it, you will be freed." The three stars looked at each other and agreed. They then went into the jungle to look for some food  read more »

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