Entertainment Jokes

What's the difference between a dead possum in the road and a dead member of the Backstreet Boys?

There are skid marks in front of the possum.

What's the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit?

One's a glueless kit and the other's a clueless git!

What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson's breasts?

Silicon Valley.

Monica Lewinsky virus: Sucks all the memory out of your computer.

Ronald Reagan virus: Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.

Mike Tyson virus: Quits after one byte.

Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB.

Lorena Bobbit virus: Turns your hard disk into a 3.5 inch floppy.

Dr. Jack Kevorkian virus: Searches your hard drive for old files and deletes them.

Ellen Degeneres virus: Your IBM suddenly claims it's a MAC.

Titanic virus: Makes your whole computer go down.  read more »

Why was Christina Aquilera surprised when she looked at her driver's license?

She had an 'F' in sex.

What do David Beckham and a Cartier watch have in common?

They both come in a Posh box!

What did Bruce Willis find on the top of Mt. Everest?

Icey dead people.

Q: What do Barbie and Britney Spears have in common?

A: Both are blonde, brainless and made out of plastic.

Similarities between the Titanic video and the Clinton grand jury testimony video:

Titanic: $9.99 on the Internet
Clinton: $9.99 on the Internet

Titanic: over 3 hours long
Clinton: over 3 hours long

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe

Titanic: villain - White Star Line
Clinton: villain - Ken Starr

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist
Clinton: Bill is a B.S. artist

Titanic: In one part, Jack enjoys a good cigar
Clinton: Ditto for Bill  read more »

How did Captain Hook die?

He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!!