A D V E R T I S E M E N T

Animal Jokes

A little rabbit is happily running through the forest

A little rabbit is happily running through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint. The rabbit looks at her and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come with me running through the forest, you'll see, you'll feel so much better!" The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit.  read more »

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

One day, a farmer walked into a bar...

One day, a farmer walked into a bar and asked the bartender for the strongest thing in the bar.

"What's wrong, fella?" asked the bartender.

"Some things you just can't explain."

"Try me."  read more »

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood...

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.

Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.

He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.

"OK, follow me" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.

Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees.

Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.  read more »

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

Why did God give women more brain cells than cows?

Q: Why did God give women more brain cells than cows?

A: So that women don't shit themselves when you play with their tits.

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

A trucker picks up a hitchhiker who climbs up in the cab and notices a monkey on the dashboard....

A trucker picks up a hitchhiker who climbs up in the cab and notices a monkey on the dashboard.

After a few miles he asks the driver what the monkey is for.

The driver says "I'll show you" and with that he hits the monkey with the back of his hand, sending the poor creature rolling across the dash.

The monkey goes down between the drivers legs, unzips his pants, pulls out his unit and proceeds to give the trucker head.

When finished ,the monkey pulls out a tissue, cleans the driver up, puts everything back and jumps back up on the dashboard.  read more »

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

A guy walks into a dentist's office

A guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth."

The dentist replies "You shouldn't be here. You should be seeing a psychiatrist..."

The guys replies, "I am seeing a psychiatrist."

The dentist says, "Well then what are you doing here?"

And the guy says, "Your light was on."

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender...

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "got any bananas?"
He gets thrown out.
He comes in the next day and asks the same thing, "got any bananas?"
Again, he gets the bums rush.
This goes on for several days until the bartender has had enough of this crap and screams,
"If you ever set foot in the bar again, I am gonna nail your stupid feet to the floor and rip your beak off!" Then the duck is thrown out into the street.

The very next day the duck once again enters the bar and walks up to the bartender.
"Hey buddy! Got any bananas?" asks the duck  read more »

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

How do you circumcisce a whale?

Q: How do you circumcisce a whale?
A: With four skin-divers...

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

What do you do to an elephant with three balls?

Q: What do you do to an elephant with three balls?

A: Walk him and pitch to the rhinoceros!

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None

What do you call a masturbating cow?

Q: What do you call a masturbating cow?

A: Beef Stroke-n-off

0
No votes yet
Your rating: None
Syndicate content