A D V E R T I S E M E N T

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Jesus is watchin you.

This guy breaks into a house, and starts stealin some jewerly out of a jewerly box. Out of nowhere he hears,"Jesus is watchin you."
He looks around, but doesn't see anything, so he goes into the next room. He starts looking around in the dressers and closets, then hears the same voice again,"Jesus is watchin you."  read more »

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Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac?

Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac?
He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.

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How do you compliment a donkey?

How do you compliment a donkey ?

"Hey, nice ass !"

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What do you call a sleeping bull?

What do you call a sleeping bull ?

A bulldozer .

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The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA

The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. The FBI goes in.  read more »

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common?

What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common?
Their middle names

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A Mexican walks into a bakery

A Mexican walks into a bakery and asks, "Excuse me, may I have a bum, please?" The baker laughs and says, "Oh, you must mean a bun, sure, here you go." The Mexican next goes to the hardware store. He asks the clerk, "Excuse me, can I get a fucket here?" The clerk laughs and says, "Oh, you must mean a bucket. Of course!" The Mexican then goes to a pet shop. He asks the manager, "May i have a Cockandspankit?" The manager laughs and says. "I think i misunderstood you, you must mean a Cockerspaniel. On his way home, the Mexican loses the leash on his dog.  read more »

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What do you call a masturbating cow?

Q: What do you call a masturbating cow?

A: Beef Stroke-n-off

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