A D V E R T I S E M E N T

Murphy's work laws

A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.

Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

Never ask two questions in a business letter. The reply will discuss the one you are least interested in, and say nothing about the other.  read more »

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The Whales

Your momma so fat, when she goes to the aquarium the whales sing "WE ARE FAMILY."

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Lipstick

Yo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind.

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rude artist

what do you call the artist with the brown fingers.
a: pic-ass-o

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blonde and a brunette

one day there was a blonde and a brunette walking down the street the brunette says to the blonde "oh look a dead bird" so the blond looks up.

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I know how to make people!!!

One day a scientist found out how to create people the way God did, so he called God and said "I know how to create people now, we don't need you anymore." God says, "okay then, show me!" The scientist says, "First, you grab some dirt. . ." and God reaches down and grabs the scientist and says, "GET YOUR OWN DIRT!!"

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Yo MAMA

Yo mama so poor... she waves around a popsicle and calls it air conditioning!

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yo mama

Yo mama so poor, when you ring her bell, she sticks her head out the window and yells, “DING DONG!”

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moo who

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Moo.
Moo, who?
Well, make up your mind, are you a cow or an owl?

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yo mama's face so ulgy!

yo mama's face is so ulgy when hitler saw her he shot himself in the head.

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